My fave beach in Laguna, at least until the waves tried to drown me on Thursday.
The last thing on my mind is an analogy that I head twice yesterday. It goes something like "It's better to be a big fish in a small pond, then a small fish in a big pond". Two people used it when discussing my dreams with me, but one said I should be the small fish, and the other said I should be the big one. This really got me to thinking about which I would rather be. Right now I think I want to be a relatively small fish. Yeah there is the danger I will get eaten, but if I stay in that small pond I wont have room to grow, to improve, to be inspired by or pushed by bigger fish. I love winning bike races, but I think I am happiest when I cross the line with nothing left in my legs and lungs. I'm happiest when I survive until the last lap in a field stacked with legit women, and even though I finish 15th I know that I gave it all I had. I have done a lot of personal growth this year in races where I don't finish in the top 5, when things went wrong, and when I had to learn to deal with disappointment. I think the successes are sweeter when you put yourself up a bigger challenge as well.
Anyway, that's where I am right now. It's been a bit of a rough week so far, but I guess off season is a good time to reflect on past decisions, and future plans, and to recommit myself to my goals and dreams.
Thanks to all of you who wholeheartedly support me. I could not make it without your cheers, advice and love.